Written By Alec Capurso for the GANCC

"A Concrete Cube"

Imagine a cube made entirely out of concrete. Then, imagine that I am inside that concrete cube. There are no doors, windows, openings or any other ways for you to get through. Meanwhile, I am just sitting in the middle of this cube, unconcerned about anything outside of it and only focused on the inside. You, however, want to break through it so that you can reach me. So, you decide to take a sledgehammer and begin to slam it on the walls, trying to make a hole. The noise is deafening, the cracks are forming and I am just sitting there unaware of what’s going on. As you get closer to me, I am unsure of how to respond. Should I respond in fear, openness, or just try to fight back against the intruder? Because, unknown to you, this cube is not a prison.

It’s a safe space that I can go to in order to avoid the hassles and horrors of the world that are still unknown to me. Inside that cube, I am protected from every potential and perceived harm that this world can throw at me. I know every inch of the inside from the corners to the sides of every nook and cranny. I feel like since I know everything about this cube, then I have a semblance of control over my surroundings. And if anyone even tries to break through to them, I will feel threatened. How would you like it if someone invaded your territory? Especially if someone took a sledgehammer to it.

But, on the flip side, you don’t know that. You only see what’s in front of you and you and make the most logical assumptions you can comprehend. You most likely would assume that I was somehow trapped in there, and you want to break me out. So, why not use the most blunt weapon you can think of to bring down the walls? It’s simple and straightforward, which is the most likely solution in this case. But, before you go through with it, maybe you should give this solution some more thought. Ask yourself is this person in danger? Is this the most logical solution to resolve this? Does this person know about this idea and how will he perceive it? What really is the best way for both of us to solve this problem? Instead, you resolve to go through with the easy way and decide that using a sledgehammer is the only way that'll work.

The right solution would be for you to be patient and try to communicate with me inside the cube. The truth is that I don’t want to be inside the cube forever, but I just don’t know how to cope with the outside. I want to leave the cube, but on my own terms. You are most likely the first person to interact with me in a long time and you’re not making a good first impression. If you could’ve been open to my own feelings about the cube, you’d understand why I didn’t want to leave. By taking time to learn about each other, we could’ve formed a sense of trust between us and see through our own perspectives. And eventually, I will leave the cube along with you. However, using the hammer only makes me less trustful of you and everything else. And now I’m exposed with no idea how to get myself aligned with the world. So, I’ll invest most of my time trying to return to that cube, which is completely destroyed now. And you have demolished it for nothing. Why would I waste my time adjusting for the world, when you wouldn’t for me?

This article is an analogy for neurodivergent workers trying to adjust to a workplace, where coworkers and superiors try to force them out of their comfort zones. Whether they want the workers to be comfortable or not, it isn’t their place to decide what’s best for them. The real way to connect with neurodiversity is to be calm and gentle, without intruding on their feelings. If you approach them with expectations of perfection, they will never learn to adapt. Adaptation depends entirely on the workers themselves whether they truly want to be open. The superior's job is to make sure that they adapt comfortably, not cautiously.